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Rebekah - How marriages jump the tracks

Gen 24-29 tells the story of their marriage.

During the 5 chapters life happened. The end is far different from the beginning.

Godly characteristics of a wife

1. To leave their family

Gen 24:58-61

:60 When they blessed her in this way they didn't know the promise God had given Abraham.

Gen 2;22-24 This doesn't mean you never see or speak to your family.
It means your relationship with them changes.

Our husband should have the position in our life our family had.

You have to learn to work things out when there is a problem.

2. Prioritize your husband.

Only God should have a place above your husband.

Yes little children take a lot of your time. But that is why it is important to have a bed time routine. To give the parents some alone time.

As children get older, their activities can take as much of your time as the children did when they were younger if you aren't careful.

It is easy to lose your connection with your husband if you aren't careful.

3. Be a helper to our husband.

God has given us different abilities then our husband. We are on the same team. We shouldn't work against each other but together.

Gen 24:67 She was doing things right in the beginning.

4. Submit to your husband.

Submission is not a bad word.

Submission is voluntarily cooperating with anyone out of love and respect for God first, and then out of love and respect for that person.

Does that mean it will be smooth sailing? No. But first you must learn to submit to God, then the rest comes easier.

Doesn't mean you don't give input into decisions. But in the end it is the husband's decision. He will be held accountable by God for that decision. We will be held accountable to God for our submission.

You don't submit to illegal or ungodly things. But in every thing else we must submit. It doesn't mean you are a doormat. You have the right to voice your opinion. It is on them if they don't consider our input before making a decision. Even if it is a bad decision, if you submit, God will take you through the consequences.

5. Respect your husband.

Ep 5:33

Respect to your husband is what love is to you. They go hand in hand.

If he doesn't get it he will shut down and become defensive.

Respect means to honor and esteem. To be thankful for the provision, protection, leadership they bring to the family.

Your words should mean the most to him. If that isn't the case, it is between him and God and God will hold him accountable.

Gen 26

What started so beautifully became so ugly. Life can get you and your marriage off track if you aren't on top of things. You can't assume things will go well if you don't work at it. You are only responsible for your part in the marriage. It is how you get back on track after problems that will determine the end result.

Once all of your children are grown and moved out, it will be just the two of you. Does your husband have a responsibilty in the relationship? Absolutely. But you are only responsible for your part. That is what you will answer to God for, not his part. You must work on your marriage now if you want a good one in the future.

Gen 26:35 The boys were a source of grief to their parents.

Gen 27:1 Isaac was old and could not see.

The oldest son would get the blessing.

Rebekah loved Jacob more and Isaac loved Esau more.

The child who causes you the most problems is the most like you.

Because another child may be easier to handle, they may appear to be your favorite if you aren't careful.

Rebekah makes Jacob appear to be Esau so he gets the blessing.

She deceived her husband. She chose her son over her husband.

Job says the latter days can be better then the former days. But you must work at it.

Because of her deception, Jacob had to run from Esau. Jacob was grown and took part in the deception. He later was deceived when he wanted to marry Rachel.

What goes around comes around as they say.

Rebekah

Gen 24 tells her story.

Isaac is grown and it is time to find a wife for him.
Abraham sent a servant to get Isaac a wife. He didn't want a wife from the people around them because they worshipped false gods.

The servant had to travel about 500 miles.

He took 10 of Abraham's camels, jewelry, etc and left.

He stopped by the well because that is where the women would come in the morning.

:15 before he is done speaking

Wouldn't it be nice if it always happened that way?

Issac and Rebekah marry.

1 Cor 7:32-34

No one knows more what is in your heart then God.

While single, there are many more opportunites for you to serve God. You have only yourself to be concerned with.

God completes you not a man.

Her name probably meant loop or tie.

Characteristics:

1. Energetic and hardworking

She watered all of the 10 camels along with the servant. She carried big heavy containers for the water. That took time and effort. Each camel would drink about 25 gallons of water. That is alot of water. Yet she ran to do it.

There is a difference between restless and energetic. Energetic people are calm while restless people are unsettled.

When you are restless, you need to seek the reason why from God.

2. Purity of body and heart

Gen 24:16

God still calls single women to purity of body and heart, whether single and never married, or single again. Just because you made a mistake and didn't stay pure, you can begin again today by asking for forgiveness and living pure from now till you are married.

3.Was generous

Not only did she give him water and his camels, but she offered him a place to stay.

Mt 5:41

We need to go the extra mile. We shouldn't look for the minimum requirement we need to do to get by.

The world is full of minimum requirement people and sadly, christians.

We shouldn't accept the minimum required from our children either. We are training them to be lazy when we do.

4. Was a woman of initiative

Gen 24:19

She didn't wait for him to ask her to water his camels.

initiative means readiness and ability to take action, one's personal responsible decision

This forever changed her life.

You won't wait for someone to ask you to do something you know needs doing if you have initiative. You will just do it.

We don't take control, but we do what we know needs to be done without waiting to be told or asked to do it.

You don't do it for recognition, you do it cause it is the right thing to do.

5. She was obedient.

Gen 24:54-58

She was quick to obey.

Delayed obedience is disobedience.

Don't count for your children to obey. You are teaching them delayed obedience, not only to you but to God.

Blessings follow obedience.

Next time we look at Rebekah married.

Lot's Wife

Gen 19

The word doesn't tell us her name.

She was prosperous and probably more attached to her things then was good for her.

While the word doesn't say she took part in the sin of Sodom, she, like Lot, tolerated it. Because of that her heart became divided.

While we study Lot's wife, we may wonder why she looked back. Let's think about us. What is the first instinct you have if you are speaking to someone and they are looking behind you and say "don't look now, but"?

The choice she made to look back led to judgment instead of mercy. She ultimately refused God's attempts to save her.

Lot and his family were so used to the sin of the city, they actually hesitated when the angels told them they would destroy the city and to leave. His son-in-laws didn't believe him and refused to leave. The angels had to grab Lot, his wife, and daughters and drag them out of the city. They were warned to flee and not look back. You can't get more direct orders then that.

Lot and his daughters probably didn't realize what happened to his wife till they reached Zoar and looked for her.

Sadly his wife is remembered for the bad choice she made instead of any good she may have done.

Scriptures on mercy and pressing on

Gen 19:16 And while he lingered, the men laid hold upon his hand, and upon the hand of his wife and upon the hand of his two daughters; the Lord being merciful unto him: and they brought him forth, and set him without the city.

Deut 13:17 And there shall cleave nought of the cursed thing to thine hand: that the Lord may turn from the fierceness of His anger, and shew thee mercy, and have compassion upon thee, and multiply thee, as He hath sworn unto thy fathers;

Ps 25:6 Remember, O Lord, Thy tender mercies and Thy lovingkindness; for they have been ever of old.

Jer 3:12 Go and proclaim these words toward the north, and say, Return, thou backsliding Israel, saith the Lord: and I will not cause Mine anger to fall upon you: for I am merciful, saith the Lord, and I will not keep anger for ever.

Phil 3:13 Brethren, I count not myself to have apprehended: but this one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind, and reaching forth unto those things which are before.
:14 I press toward the mark for the prize of the high calling of God in Christ Jesus.

Hagar

The post below this was done yesterday, but I didn't get a chance to type it in.
Here is todays:


Her name means fugitive or immigrant

You really can't do any kind of study on Sarah without studying Hagar.

Hagar was one of Sarah's handmaidens. She was an Egyptian and probably was given to them one of the times they lied about Sarah being Abraham's wife.

Even though she was a foreigner and a slave with no rights or choices as to becoming Abraham's wife, God cared for her and her son.

She despised Sarah after she conceived according to Gen 16:4. I am sure as her belly grew with the baby, she held it over Sarah's head that she could give Abraham a child when Sarah couldn't.

Sarah and Abraham both shared in being responsible for the mess that followed. Hagar had no choice. Except for her choice of how she treated Sarah after she got pregnant.

Hagar should have thought her actions out first. But then so should we.

In Gen 16 it tells how things got so bad for her, she fled.

In verse 7 it says the angel of the Lord found her. He told her to return to Sarah and submit to her. That God was looking after her. Hagar listened and obeyed. She was told to name her son Ishmael, which means God hears. Many years later she would be forced to leave. Again an angel came to her and saved her and her son. God saw, heard, and was faithful to her.

Obviously at the beginning Sarah trusted Hagar or she wouldn't have chosen her to have the baby. But pride changed Hagar. And I am sure Sarah, by this time was regretting taking things into her own hands.

Here are a few promises from God's word.

Ps 4:8 I will both lay me down in peace and sleep: for Thou Lord only makest me dwell in safety.

Ps 119:50 This is my comfort in my affliction: for Thy word hath quickened me

Ps 138:7 Though I walk in the midst of trouble, Thou wilt revive me: Thou shalt stretch forth Thine hand against the wrath of mine enemies, and Thy right hand shall save me.

Because He is an all-knowing Father who hears the cries of His children, nothing that happens to us can ever escape His notice.

Do you have the right to know why?

I am still studying things about Sarah.

Gen 21:1 In one translation it says the Lord was gracious to Sarah.

I like that. But.. in our time of waiting we get impatient and take things into our own hands sometimes as I said in my last post. When we do that we miss the graciousness of God until we realize what we are doing and surrender it to God.

Sometimes God waits till our situation is beyond impossible as He did with Sarah. She was way beyond child bearing years when she had Isaac. At that point we know there is no doubt but that our deliverance from the situation is from God. Sometimes the answer isn't what we were expecting either.

We must not only surrender our expectation of what our answer will look like, but the right to know why a situation happens. Or why the answer is different then we expected.

No where in the word does it say our way as a christian will be easy. But the word does say He will never leave or forsake us in the situation.

Just as we don't owe our children an explanation for what we tell them to do or not do, God doesn't owe us one either.

Sometimes we give them an answer. Sometimes God gives us an answer. More times then not He doesn't.

As long as our answer comes as we expect, our faith is strong, but it should be just as strong (but it usually isn't) when it doesn't come as expected, or in the time period we want.

As long as you hold on to the right to know the why, you remain in bondage to that. Peace comes when you give up the right to know why.

Your faith shouldn't be based on the outcome of a situation, but on the One you believe in and Who He Is.

God doesn't owe us anything. He has already one more for us then we deserve.

Jn 9:1 the disciples asked why

There is no way that this blind man thought his sight would be given to him in this way.

When we get this desperate we won't care how the answer comes.

In this case Jesus gave a why. He didn't have to but He wanted them to know He came to do the works of God.

Jn 9:18-25

The Jews expected Jesus to come as a king but He came in a different way. Because of that they didn't believe He was the promised One. They are still praying and waiting for Him today. Such a shame, they missed the answer they have been praying for all this time. Will we miss the answer that we are praying for cause it isn't the one we expect?

Lk 7:18-23

We can become offended when we don't receive an answer the way we expect, or in our timing or the answer to why.

Is 40:31 But they that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint.

Anyone who knows me knows this is one of my favorite verses.

Waiting is not always easy for me, but I stand on this verse when waiting is difficult. Hope it helps someone else.

Some more waiting scriptures:

Ps 27:14 Wait on the Lord: be of good courage, and He shall strengthen thine heart: wait, I say, on the Lord.

Ps 130:5 I wait for the Lord, my soul doth wait, and in His word do I hope.

Is 30:18 And therefore will the Lord wait, that He may be gracious unto you, and therefore will He be exalted, that He may have mercy upon you: for the Lord is a God of judgment: blessed are all they that wait for Him.

Micah 7:7 Therefore I will look unto the Lord, I will wait for the God of my salvation: my God will hear me.

Being Patient in Waiting

I am still looking at Sarah today. She waited 25 years for the promise from God to be fulfilled. She wasn't always patient though. She was human after all and that is a long time to wait.

Gen 18:10-15

She was past child bearing age when the angel came and said that in a year she would have a child. God wanted there to be NO doubt that this child was from the promise He gave.

:14 Is any thing too hard for the Lord?

21:1-7 And the Lord visited Sarah as He had said, and the Lord did unto Sarah as He had spoken.

God always fulfills His promises, but in His time not ours.

Her laughter then was of disbelief but it was turned to laugher of joy.

Issac means he laughs. Pretty appropriate isn't it?

The time of the promise of a son, till the actual birth was 25 years. Would you wait that long? Small children have no patience, but as a mature christian we should be able to wait patiently. Not as easy as it sounds.

Waiting in Websters means to remain inactive in readiness or expectation.

Sometimes the answer is immediate. But that is the exception to the rule.

The season of waiting is for our heart to be prepared for the answer when it comes.

Heb 6:13-15 And so, after he (Abraham) had patiently endured, he obtained the promise.

One of the fruits of the Spirit is patience. The world says do/get everything right now, but the word says be patient.

Benefits of walking through a season of waiting:

1. A season of waiting will reveal our heart to us.

Sometimes we don't see what is really in our heart till we have to wait. God isn't surprised by what is in there. Sometimes He uses the wait time to prune us in areas.

2. Brings about a right perspective.

We come to the place where we realize the answer has nothing to do with us and everything to do with Him.

We serve Him for WHO HE IS, not what He will or can do for us.

3. It helps us realize we were never in control to begin with of when or how our answer will come. It is in His hands and His time. We still pray, but we have to wait.

4. Helps us to put our trust in God. We must trust God to do as He said. Saying we trust God is different then believing in our heart.

Is 46:11 yea, I have spoken it, I will also bring it to pass; I have purposed it, I will also do it.

5. Brings peace of God to our life.

When you finally turn it over to God, you will have peace. No more restlessness or wrestling inside of us.

Is 55:8-9 For My thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways My ways, saith the Lord.
:9 For as the heavens are higher then the earth, so are My ways higher then your ways, and My thoughts then your thoughts.

6. It puts us in the right position.

Once we have done all that we can do including pray it puts us in the position to know it is up to Him.

7. It allows us to hear God's voice more clearly.

We begin to listen for Him more and to speak less. We still pray but we begin to really listen for Him and to hear what He wants us to hear.

8. It allows Christ's character to be formed in us.

We end the season of waiting more like Christ. This should be our goal during this time.

There comes a time when we have to surrender what we think the answer will look like and accept that His answer may be different then we expected.